You Shall Not Pass...Gas!

A new commercial for the Lord of the Rings Online (LOTRO) computer game, advertising that it is now free to play, prompted me to act out the lines from the book and film. I entered the living room to deliver my lines to the family (Grandma & Grandaddy are visiting): "You shall not pass," as Gandalf (above) commanded the Balrog in Mines of Moria over Khazad-dûm (see actual scene). Jack then topped my performance, as if staff and sword in hand. Enhancing the line with a slight add lib he said, "You shall not pass gas!" That's my boy!